October 2013 – Welcome to the life of Sew Yupik

October 29, 2013

A weekend filled with sewingness

This past weekend I took a class to finish a couple of projects I had.

My sister in law requested a qaspeq, and an old friend for his daughter. Seeing as how I only have one pattern that is for myself I figured the class would be perfect!

Here is how they turned out! I am happy with the colors and the fun-ness of them both! I was happy to use Jeannes machine and serger! Those flowers and intricite details would not be there if it werent for the amazing janome!

Here is my sister in laws. I just love the bright colors!

With the leftover fabric I was able to whip out a cute reversible bag!

I love this one! The fireweed fabric is so gorgeoumous!

Nothing filling a weekend full of sleeping and lounging around with sewing! yay!

October 29, 2013November 8, 2013

In a blink of an eye…

And just like that within one heartbeat

one blink of an eye

one short, swallow, hot breath

my life is turned upside down

those three words that we long to hear

I love you

turn to

~~I hate you~~

All that work

All that hope

Everything down the drain

Secretly wishing it will clog and life will stand still

just

for

moment

Yet again.

Those words slither back into my life

everything will be fine

shes still your mother

shes a good person

all I want to do is go back to that moment

the moment before everything drastically spiraled out of control

to that heartbeat if I could grasp it

or hold my breath just for a moment

things may be normal

and my life will return right side up

foolish.

I am a fool for believing

A fool for wishing

And a fool for wasting empty tears

Life will never be normal.

I will always be upside down.

October 24, 2013October 29, 2013

5 Ways to Give Off Positive Energy

The key to life is Happiness. A happy you= A happy family= happy friends=happiness! Its the circle of life!

Have you ever walked into a room and felt negativity in the air? Feeling another person’s energy is actually very common. If you give off positive energy, other people will feel better around you. In contrast, if you give off negative energy others are likely to feel tense and likely want to leave. Positive beliefs, thoughts and feelings turn into positive energy that you put into the universe. YOU control your energy. Whether it be positive or negative, your energy affects everyone you come in contact with.

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October 24, 2013

Busy Bee

I feel like Ive been a busy bee busting out projects.

A year later I finally finished the wall hanging! Whoogtee! I am learning… And I am learning to finish projects on my own and its exciting! Here is the finished project!

This is my twister wall hanging. I started this last year and feels so damn good to finish it!

Ive been wanting to start making my own clothes. Slowly. Here is my latest creation. I had a blast making this and it makes me excited to start making more, and more and more. 🙂 So here it is!

Here is the finished product! And I love it!

Now that I know how to do all the fun details I cant wait to bust out more! If you dont know what a qaspeq is check out this website Qaspeq

Qaspeqs are perfect for berry picking, boating, fishing, and everyday use. I love mine. I love mine especially since I have made them. I know that they are all made with love. My hope is to make fun qaspeq creations.

Happy Thursday!

October 23, 2013November 8, 2013

Blessing in Disguise

Sleepless nights

Rude awakenings

Helpless cries

All blessings in disguise

You may argue

I will disagree

Without those late nights

And

Early mornings

I would be lost

~~Shattered~~

~~Broken~~

Maybe even gone.

Because of these blessings

I am strong

I am happy

And I am fulfilled

Full of life and happiness

My blessings are your nightmares but

Without them I would not be where I am today,

Happy

When dealing with my alcoholic mother poetry always soothed my soul.

Late nights with my mind wandering all over the place I found it comforting to put my thoughts into beautiful wording. If I made it beautiful maybe it would help? And it sure did.

Addiction is real. Addiction is real hard. And real sad. Its tough dealing with at 5 years old, and is still hard at 26. How do you move on? How do you not worry? Its impossible. As much as I want to not think of her. Worry about her. My mind always seems to wander back to her. Is she okay? Is she alive?

How do you handle it? What helps you? For me it seems openly talking about it, and writing about it. I know I am not the only one. I am sure there are hundreds. Millions. Out there that are in my same shoes. Speak up. You are not alone.

This is me jumping in Paris 5 years ago. A happy time for me.

October 21, 2013October 21, 2013

One of those days…

Just one of those days where you feel like just quitting.

It would be so much easier just to stop caring. And stop doing.

Oh, how easy it would be to ~~stop.~~ But you cant. You just have to keep going. If you were to stop, you fail. If you were to quit, whats the point?

Just keep swimming. Thats all I hear in my head.

I keep telling myself to hold it in, but I can feel the tears swelling up in my eyes. Just when you think things are looking up, they taking a nasty turn downhill. So fast. How do things like that just happen. From one mutter of a word, all of a sudden its World War III in my house.

Teenage boys are not easy. Teenage boys are not easy when they are not your own. Teenage boys are not easy when they are not your own, they are 16, and me just 10 years older. They are not easy when I am painted to be the bad guy. I am the terrorizer of my husbands previous relationship. Im the devil. Its not easy.

And today, was just one. of. those. days.

I think why not put on 8tracks classical/study and calm and soothe my mind. But it just makes it that much easier for the tears to flow.

Especially since I dont remember the last time I spoke with my mother. When did she last tell me she loved me? Im not her, and I never want to be here. Being present in my step-childrens lives is important to me and I make it a priority.

I feel like I am doing everything in my power to be the best step-mother. I am trying my best to raise a respectable teenage boy to be hard-working, honest, and fun-loving. But, yet all I get are door slams, mutters of utter disgust underneath his breath, and disrespect.

What am I doing wrong? What do I need to do? I feel like I am out of options. I have ~~exhausted~~ and I mean exhausted I am at the point of breaking and no return.

I know parenting is tough and repetitive. But how many times can I repeat myself? At some point, it sticks with them… Right?

I hope…

Breathe.

Just keep swimming.

I guess…

What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.
Confucius

October 20, 2013

Pumpkin Spice Coffee Creamer From Scratch!

The stores where I live are behind the times and I am just going to pull up my sleeves and bust out some delicious Pumpkin Spice Creamer! Cant wait to try this bad boy out! Thanks for the recipe 🙂

granolagirlbakes

We have a thing for pumpkin and once the first day of Fall is here, it is officially “pumpkin season” at my house! 🙂 We used to consume numerous Pumpkin Spice Lattes from Starbucks but since we gave up starbucks we have had a hard time finding a good Pumpkin Spice latte flavor. Plus, we try to stay away from coffee syrups. So, when Lydia saw this recipe she knew she needed to give it a try. And honored me with the privilege of making the Pumpkin Spice coffee creamer for her. 😉 She loved it! And for Lydia to “love it”, it means this is a spectacular recipe! Real pumpkin, pure maple, and spice makes up the perfect fall coffee. 🙂

The recipe originated from Deliciously Organic. I did add additional vanilla and cinnamon. If you prefer your coffee a little sweeter I recommend adding more maple syrup!…

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October 20, 2013

My creations in a nutshell

With the help of my good friend we were able to bust out this quilt in 16 hours for my aunt and uncles 50th anniversary.

As a quilter, sewer, creator I am discovering that I love to make new things. I love to play around and make new creations. Everything I make I have taken a class, pinterested, or just accidently created it. Its a fun process and I learn something new every time I am creating things. I want to eventually make my own clothes, once I am skilled enough. On my Christmas list is a serger. I think I am ready to tackle that fear of using a serger and start expanding my sewing skills.

Qaspeqs — I took a class and was able to bust out these 2 qaspeqs with bags from left over fabric.

This is the first apron that I ever made. I just copied the pattern from an apron that was given to me.

I made this for a good friend. I had a hard time giving this one away I love the colors.

WIth the help of a great friend I was able to make this for an old friend in Takotna. First time making a hat with a velcro strap.

My auntie made me the red stocking when I was a young girl. I wanted to keep the tradition alive and made my step-children and husband stockings.

I wanted to make my gifts last year and these were the gift packages I created. Pillowcases, apron, and a fish bag.

Qaspeq I made in a weekend class. I find I bust out more when I take a class.

Love the colors, and the pockets this was my favorite to make.

I gave this to my cousin for Christmas last year. I love giving away homemade gifts.

This was the first scrap quilt I made. I love scrap quilts.

October 20, 2013October 20, 2013

Halloween trick or treat creations

I had a blast making these halloween trick or treat bags for my step-children, nieces, and adopted nieces. I followed this simple two sided bag tutorial from Skip to My Lou’s website and just ran with it. I had left over Dora fabric and lined T and M’s bags, and used them for the base for e and g’s bags. The girls all loved their bags and I had so much making them. A little fabric goes a looong way.

Side b for Halloween trick or treat bag E

October 19, 2013October 19, 2013

Never have I ever…

Never have I ever heard parenting was…

Easy.

Simple.

Straight-forward.

A piece of cake.

Never have I ever thought parenting involved…

Placing your child in front of a television to keep them “entertained.”

Choosing work over your child.

Choosing partying over your child.

I dont have children, but have I have 4 amazing step-children. The oldest lives at home and is a 16 year old teenage boy. Its not easy and everyday is an uphill battle but I continue to try. The three others live with their mother. Any chance we get we go and spend time with them. Phones set aside unless they are playing on them. Our attention is given to them 110%. Stories are read. Games are played. Hugs are given. I loves you are said often. We are present in the moment with them and it feels amazing. Those days spent with them are treasured and we count down the days until our next visit.

Its not easy to see them because of where we live. We live in a remote community 400 miles west of Anchorage. Our plane tickets round-trip are $400 each. To get a place to stay over the weekend costs us another $400. And then you calculate food our trip is easily $1500 if not more. Thats not including our cost of living here in my hometown of Bethel. Mortgage $1000, internet/cable/cell phones/home phone $450, electricty $120, fuel $350, water/sewer $100, and then you include groceries, and gas thats another $1500 a month easily. As you can see its pretty difficult, and you may ask why live here? Well my step son is graduating in 2 years and he has made this his home. It would be awfully hard to uproot him. So in the meantime we will tough it out and live out every moment to the fullest.

Parenting takes work, attention, love, guidance, fun and more. So put down your phones. Take the time and have fun.

Parenting is tough and it involves every part of your being. They need direction, guidance, love, and attention. They need direction to follow the right, or better path. They need guidance and advice. They need to be told “I love you,” everyday, and they need to be showered with love. They need to be given attention and played with.

What they dont need is to be placed in front of a television, given a phone to play with for hours at a time. They are the priority.

I know as a child of alcoholic. My mother chose booze over me my whole life. Its sad I have witnessed this type of treatment first hand. It kills me to see it happen…

Think about others. Think about your children. Dont place priority on a jug, or others.

Children should always be placed first before anything else.